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Tag Archives: xmas

‘F*ck It, It’s Christmas’ Claims Bankrupt, Recently Diagnosed Alcoholic After he is Admitted to Hospital With Type 2 Diabetes

The public are being warned of the dangers saying, ‘Yea, fuck it, it’s Christmas’ to more or less anything this festive season, after a Brighton man was left in a terrible pickle following 72 hours or using the phrase. Jeremy Dugmore was hospitalised after stopping giving two shits about his own personal and financial well-being…

December 3, 2018 in News.

Thousands of Turkeys to March on Brighton Demanding a Second Christmas Referendum

As many as 10,000 turkeys are set to march along Brighton seafront tomorrow in a last-ditch attempt to put a stop to this year’s Christmas.   The protest comes two years after 52% of turkeys voted for Christmas despite it resulting in their death and subsequent consumption.  Since the vote it has been claimed that…

November 22, 2018 in Politics, Uncategorized.

Smug Woman Who Has Finished All Her Christmas Shopping Manages to go 45 Minutes Without Mentioning it

A Brighton woman who completed all her Christmas shopping in August has shocked friends, family and co-workers by going a WHOLE 45 minutes without bringing it up in conversation. Sue Roberts, 34 of Findon Road, has been dubbed ‘Smug Sue’ by her pals after telling any poor sod that will listen, that she did all her…

November 22, 2017 in News.

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