The public are being warned of the dangers saying, ‘Yea, fuck it, it’s Christmas’ to more or less anything this festive season, after a Brighton man was left in a terrible pickle following 72 hours or using the phrase. Jeremy Dugmore was hospitalised after stopping giving two shits about his own personal and financial well-being…
As many as 10,000 turkeys are set to march along Brighton seafront tomorrow in a last-ditch attempt to put a stop to this year’s Christmas. The protest comes two years after 52% of turkeys voted for Christmas despite it resulting in their death and subsequent consumption. Since the vote it has been claimed that…
Sussex Police have today issued a warning to last minute Christmas shoppers not to sweat as retailers announced supplies of the trusty Lynx Africa gift sets have reached critically low levels. The news of the shortage was announced yesterday evening on the official Lynx UK twitter page, with news of the drought quickly spreading across…
We have all been there, it’s the work Christmas party, you have been stuck listening to Tracey from accounts shoot her mouth off about her broken marriage for the last 45 minutes. You want to go home however you don’t want a fuss over leaving, you do not want anyone to try and convince you…
A Brighton woman who completed all her Christmas shopping in August has shocked friends, family and co-workers by going a WHOLE 45 minutes without bringing it up in conversation. Sue Roberts, 34 of Findon Road, has been dubbed ‘Smug Sue’ by her pals after telling any poor sod that will listen, that she did all her…
The good people of Brighton could have to wait as long as 7pm on Christmas Day to receive their presents from Father Christmas this year. A statement released from his HQ at the North Pole this morning explained that Santa was not willing to spend his ‘hard earned’on Brighton’s extortionate parking prices and has instead…
