Local Man Successfully Avoids Stranger He Spent Five Hours Pouring His Heart Out To Whilst ‘Off His Face’ At A House Party Last Weekend

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A Brighton man doing a shop in his local Co-Op had a lucky escape yesterday as he was just metres away from bumping into the total stranger he basically told his life story to whilst off his chops at a house party last Saturday.

Joel Spicer was in the Church Road branch of Co-op when he spotted the man enter the shop. The twenty four year old thought on his feet and swiftly made his way to the corner of the shop pretending to get money from the in-store cash machine whilst the other gentleman walked behind him browsing before Mr Spicer made a hasty exit from the shop.

It was a stark contrast to the pair’s first meeting where they immediately hit it off after getting chatting out a house party in Kemp Town. Mr Spicer describes how events unfolded, ‘Yea I was out on the lash with my mate Danny and he knew a girl who was having a house party so we made our way there. It must have only been about midnight but I had been on the sesh since about 7pm so I was pretty wired.The next thing I know this fella walks in the kitchen and we get chatting. F*ck me sideways I must have told him my whole life story! My hopes, my dreams, my regrets, I told the geezer stuff I would be too embarrassed to tell my doctor. Once we were done talking about me we did Brexit, The US election and by the time we got on to the best roast dinner in Brighton the sun was coming up.’ 

After more than five hours pretending to listen to what each other were saying before impatiently butting in so they could give their own two pence, the two friends went their separate ways. They swapped numbers, became friends on Facebook, followed each other on Twitter and vowed to meet up at least once a fortnight for the rest of their lives before Mr Spicer caught a cab back to Hove.

However the bromance was short lived as a wave of self loathing overcame Mr Spicer the next day. ‘I felt like a right twat to be honest. started getting flashbacks of chewing the ear off this poor guy, I was mortified. I took a bit of comfort in the fact I would probably never see him again and went down the Co-Op to get a lasagna and some Haribo and who do I see walk in?! It’s the bloody same guy. I nearly shat my pants it would have been so awkward. Luckily I avoided him and got out of there, I basically ran home and I haven’t been out since for fear of meeting him. To be honest it’s been three days and I’m starting to get a bit peckish now.’ He explained.

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